More than any other country I’ve visited, China has an abundance of hilarious English translations and all-around bizarre signs.
My theory to why China in particular is so affected by this hilarious plight – as opposed to, say, Indonesia, which has generally very accurate English signs – is because:
1. The level of English comprehension in China is lower than other countries I’ve traveled to, especially compared to those in Europe but also to Hong Kong or Malaysia.
2. English words carry a certain style and modernity to them in China, with the presence of the words being more significant to people than the actual meaning. This leads to Chinese people putting English words on everything. And I mean everything.
3. The Great Chinese Internet Firewall blocks most Western sites, such as Google Translate. I presume their native translator applications are not as reliable.
This, however, doesn’t account for the fact that many Chinese signs are also quite strange (at least to this Westerner) and seemingly out of place.
As a preamble, I want to stress that this is not an attempt to make fun of Chinese people, and I certainly don’t see this as a means of asserting Western superiority. I actually really admire China’s efforts to maintain their native language against the proliferation of English words and American culture that insidiously creeps into languages all around the world. The fact is, these signs are simply hilarious!
For this post, I’ll let the pictures do most of the talking, adding explanations and locations where needed.
2018 – In a Beijing hotel near the international airport, where I had to stay overnight because I missed my connecting flight, I was greeted with the friendly sign “Welcome To Our Hotkl!” In the elevator going up to my room, signs advertised the hotel restaurant, with dishes like “Dumplings son”, “MAO blood flourishing”, and “Spicy beauty shoes”. Sounds delicious!
Apparel is no exception to the funny translations. I don’t feel too bad taking photos of random pedestrians because they always do the same to me too!
2019 – Nanjing, subway. This shirt is basically gibberish. Here’s what I can decipher: “Mehteyens… once while both of tme… took … cluding leting het water… med that ihad wyo goldris heta… had ifo goldris heta continlualy… and telinga bild and woromlish”
2019 – Nanjing, Purple Mountains. How did this come to be? I demand an answer! “God & Joker. Be Yourself be Choc. I feel all alone, I will never leave you. I’m too tired, I will give you rest. I’m not smart enough, I will give you wisdom. I can’t forgive myself, I forgive you. Nobody loves me. I love you. ILOVECHOC”. That’s poetry if I’ve ever heard it.
Restaurants, cafes and food products all sprinkle delicious English phrases and assorted gibberish to pepper up their offerings like exotic spices.
Left to right: 1) 2018 – Qingdao, Chinese BBQ restaurant (烧烤). The tin can labeled “Original Sweet Flowers” was for the leftover meat skewers. 2) 2019 – Nanjing, Purple Mountains. Hit the “New York Energy Station” for a little boost while visiting Sun Yatsen’s Mausoleum. 3) 2018 – Wuhan, shopping mall. Inspiring fashion slogans such as “I’m beauty, survivor” and “We make up wake up to bright” decorate the entrance of the mall.
Left to right: 1) 2018 – Wuhan, cafe. “The world has kissed my soul with its pain, asking for its return in “Mua-Tea”. What a tragic beverage indeed. 2) 2017, Beijing, cafe. “Love yourself well, that’s life, and you will never know what will happen next second”.
China’s public infrastructure is amazing, with 33 cities in China having their own subway systems. Little did I know that the subways would also be a gold mine for funny signs. Often the icons they pick for their subway warnings are the best part.
Left to right: 1) 2017 – Qingdao, subway. 2) 2019 – Nanjing, subway. “No Swinging, No Climbing, No Spitting”. 3) 2018 – Wuhan, Subway. Look at that “No Chasing” icon.
So far, I’ve been mainly focusing on the mistranslations in China, but many signs are strange in any language. For example, by the peaks of the Yellow Mountains (黄山), in complete immersion of nature and flora, I found these two signs.
2019 – Yellow Mountains. 1) A motion sensor activated sign speaks out to you at the top of the mountain proclaiming the police is there to protect the forest and you. 2) In another section of the mountain range, this panel-sign advertises the Swiss Jungfraujoch. Once you finish climbing the Yellow Mountains, the Swiss Alps are an obvious next step I guess.
Then there is the truly weird. I discovered this public health sign in Quanzhou, a town a few hours northeast from Guilin. How I ended up there is a story for another time, but seeing this sign left me in awe.
2019 – Quanzhao, hotel elevator. This sign explains how to prevent the spread of AIDs. In the top left corner, it advises: “No prostitution, no whorehouses, no smoking drugs”. In the top right corner, it colorfully illustrates to always wear a condom “during unsafe sex”. In the left center box, the sign warns against using someone else’s toothbrush, razor, or nail-clippers, otherwise they might give you AIDs. In the right center, it recommends healthy activities outside and long working hours to reduce sexual frustrations and impulses. In the left bottom box, the sign says to avoid frequent medical procedures such as beauty operations. Finally, in the bottom right it advises to go to the doctor if your nether regions are uncomfortable. What a sign!
When traveling around China, you never know what you are going to find. I always enjoy these real-world scavenger hunts and will be ready to capture more when the time comes. Life is a lot more fun when you can turn a corner and discover a wonderfully bizarre sign that you keep returning to for years.
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